September 15
i’m a scatterbrain right now.. anything goes here.. so.. welcome to my brain and heart, sort of..
start..
you remember my baby, Potchi before?
this is him now:
he used to love the camera so much, but for some reason.. he doesn’t want me to take a single decent picture of him now.. he’s growing up way too fast, it’s unfair..
next..
went to a Photoshoot today.. all went well as expected.. what i wasn’t expecting was a rush of emotion that surprised me in between takes.. (i’m not yet allowed to disclose any pictures for now, well.. i was actually the one who ordered them not to.. hahahah! but i promise to put it up ASAP! :D)
the shoot had me thinking of Cayman Islands (home, i know it’s where i belong).. i’ll be leaving the Philippines any time soon but can i really do it?.. all the friends that i’ve made here.. can i leave them behind just like that?.. i don’t think i ever can but i have to.. i just know i have to..
change is inevitable.. i kept chanting this to myself a while ago.. now, i’m in the situation where i’m walking with determination and dread, half marching forward, half sinking backwards in fear..
i know that there is no way getting around this and there are no shortcuts, and if i do take the “shortcut,” there will be repercussions..
talking myself down..
“there are voids that sit inside each and every one of us, and what we do to fill them, determines whether or not we drift off into oblivion, or settle down comfortably; stable and at peace”
if there is anything i realized today it would be that the world doesn’t always go the way you want it to be, but the fact that it doesn’t is really amazing, because then you discover surprises that you’ve never imagined..
i’m grateful..
before, i was barely getting through each day.. wishing that i can just go to Cayman and it will make everything better.. but now.. it’s all different.. if you became a part of my life, you currently are and if you do plan to stay.. i just wanna say THANK YOU! you’re a big part of the reason why i thank the Lord each day for giving me a life that is always worth living..
xx,
April :)
